Posted by: pursuingsub17 | June 6, 2009

Lack of support from the one person I need the most support from


I know I just posted something for the day but I just went through something that is so upsetting, I need to add another post.

I’m crying right now – and I am experiencing a personal hurt that needs to get out of my head or I won’t do well tomorrow. Marc has been working, like I said, on the weekends with his side home reno business. Bad enough that he doesn’t make time for himself – but I’m feeling more neglected and hurt now than I ever have. Now I really know that there is NO WAY IN HELL I will let him be my coach next year.

It’s 7:25 pm. I’m making dinner and he’s going to be late. That’s okay. But then he confirmed with me what time my race is tomorrow. Why? Because he needs to plan out his day. He said after my race he’s taking off to his job because he wants to finish up there. He doesn’t have to – he wants to. Why does this upset me? Two reasons:

  1. I have been to every one of his races since we met – including 3 Ironman races, one half Ironman and every sprint and olympic distance race. I was there because I enjoy cheering him on and as his girlfriend, I want to show my support.
  2. He set aside work and a bike work out last weekend with a team mate to go to another city (with me) and support the woman he’s been coaching (Prima). I remember saying “oh, that’s too bad you can’t make your bike practice with Andrew” and he said “yes, but I’m *name*‘s coach and it’s important for me to be there for her and show my support – as well as the other runners from *nearby town’s name*.”

Wow. Thanks for your support Marc. I’ve spent the last three years supporting you and showing up to all your races and when I could really use you the most, you’re not only going to make me drive by myself to my race, you’re going to take off as soon as I’m done. On top of all that, he got snippy with me when I said I would appreciate it if we went and left together. I started crying when I thought about all the support he gives Prima.

I was always proud of the fact that Marc’s pursuit of Ironman never hurt our relationship. Not once did I ever think that ME pursuing Ironman would tear us apart. I think it will. We live together but I’m glad we’re not married. If he doesn’t turn the tables soon, we’re going to end up like a lot of other Ironman relationships – broken.

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